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Richard Jespers
Zebra Rhymes With Debra


Zebra Rhymes with Debra—21 (Chicago) w4m
Reply to: pers-945***1238@crablegz.com
Date: 2008-12-18, 11:49 AM CST
[Photo: full-face, hair pulled back, no smile.]

So where do I start when writing a personal ad online . . . hmmm . . . this is my 2nd time, n obviously I didn’t find anything gud the 1st time or I wudn’t b writing again.

Basics . . . I’m Zebra (rhymes with Debra), 21, 5’6, n a thickie thick BBW 220, honey carmel brown eyes, big soft lips, soft skin, cute feet, 4 piercings, 1 tat (‘your sweet mama’ inkt in black across my backside), caring, romantic, goofy (remember my tat), but honest, determined, faithful, attractive, smart, 100% real blunt, full of life, fun to be around, love to laugh, ambition love n motherhood (n that order), long term goal: 2 b a FBI agent in fraud, love to travel, open 4 new things. Looking for sum1 with a lot of same qualities: smart, attractive, sweet, faithful, 100% real, loves to laugh, funny, taller than me, has head on straight, n sum1 I can click wit n b comfortable wit. Is that 2 hard 2 find? F u think we cud hit it off n u have what I want n need then feel free to email me with a pic n a lil about urself. I’m not here to hook up SO NO THANK YOU TO THAT, jus wanna meet sum1 new! If i’m not ur thing then back off n good luck wit the next ad. be sure n get ur flu shots—especially if you work in the public—they save lives.
z
XOXO
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Dear Sox,
My son, my son—I prefer Zebra to Zebrady (Zenobia+Brady, my aunt & uncle). I want you to know I wasn’t always big. It’s like I’ve done something wrong, like robbing a bank or farting in church, and I’m being punished (not by God, he is gracious nobel and good). I was a girl everyone liked because I was so sweet and malleable (you should look it up before 2 long). After I gave birth to you is when I began to put on the pounds, but it isn’t your fault. I felt food was my only friend, the only thing that made me feel human. And I was fourteen. When you’re fourteen, maybe you’ll understand why I gave you away to your beautiful family in Illinois (that’s all I know). They could give you a home that I couldn’t, not for quite a few years anyway.

I’m going to night school to learn criminal law, but my biggest challenge is to lose about seventy pounds. I don’t feel like I can apply to the police academy till I’m more fit. I just get carried away when there’s food in the room. I live with your grandmother and your two aunts and their three kids. It’s a full house, I can tell you that. (You’re supposed to LOL.) I wish I cud b stronger when it come to Mama’s cherry pies, her pastries. Everything she cook is so good, fried chicken, chicken fried steak, Steak Diane. She not real big on veggies or fruit, that may be the problem. Those things be so expensive, the fresh ones espesh. I tell her to buy things by the can, and she just make a face like this (her big nose get all wrinkly, her eyes all crinkly). But whatever food is in the room, I make friends with it faster than you can blink. You goin to finish that wing, sister? Here, take it, she says, skinny as a lamb’s leg. Or your other auntie, she hate her potatoes, and I eat all those. Or if I get up in the middle of the night to pee, I steal what’s left of the pie, wash the pan and put it away so everyone will forget that Mama ever made it, LOL, right?

I named you Sox b/c that’s what the Clintons named their cat. No offense, but if I had named you David or Jamal, then . . . I would have got attached to you, the few minutes before they took you away and gave you to your new family. So whatever your real name is, you’ll always be Sox to me, and I’ll always love you. If you see a big black woman on the street where you live, or if you have a babysitter that’s about my age, then maybe you’ll try to make your mind see me at fourteen and you as a little baby and how I couldn’t have taken care of you. Oh, Sox I hope you can forgive me. I luv u.
Zebra with a Z

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Dear Sox,
How are you doin? You must be an amazing reader by now. Hope so b/c I love to read myself. Just finished something by a woman named Hurston. She was born in 1890, century before last. She wrote lots of books about strong women, black women who talk like themselves instead of what white people think they talk like. I’m repeating myself, but I want you to know I didn’t want to give you away. I was 14. Do you realize I’m just now 21 and I still cudn’t afford to support you? I live with my mother and sisters and their kids, and I go to school so I can grow up and be a responsible parent like your mother and father that adopted u. Please know that no matter what happens, I’ll always stop dead when it’s your birthday and blow you a kiss. On every Valentine’s Day, when you feel a little tickle on your cheek, you’ll know it be me. If you can, stop and blow me one 2, and I’ll know the tickle on my cheek came from you.

Love,
Zebra. (Remember it rhymes with Debra)

I’m folding your letter and seeling it in this pretty blue envelope. I’m opening a metal box and filing it away with the others. No one but you will ever read them. Some day, if you try to find out who your mother is (I keep the agency current with my address and phone), maybe you cud call me (I’ll listen for your
eepie beepie) and we’ll hang. Just two people meeting. No Strings. No blame. No guilt, just love. Zebra

Be sure n get ur flu shot.